Don’t live a dull (adult) life

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If  your life consist of getting up at 7:30, be at work by 9, get home at 6:30, cook, study for some professional designation exam, browsing on your cellphone, playing Clash of Clans, going to be, would you rather have a different life?  Because this life offers very little exploring, limited brain activities, not enough interactions or ideas exchange.

Weekend gets only slightly better – brunch with friends, occasional artsy stuff, wholefoods grocery shopping and household chores. And this process repeats itself like your first name.

If you knew it is going to be like this, would you have tried so hard in the years of school and work? Would you have studied rigorously in school, gone out to seek part-time work in college, volunteered in communities, pushed yourself to make friends with a goal of a better life? Because none of the effort seems to matter, in this life of dullness and routine.

Where’s the support? The people who are supposed to be the closest to you does not understand you. Not even slightly. You felt you are set back, pulled down, and mentally alone. You wonder if there is anything you could do to change this miserable life, this adult life.

Where is the freedom? Colorado or Boston won’t satisfy you. It has to be international. It has to be novel. But wait, you are still waiting for that H1B. Today is just another start of the 6 month quarantine.

Where is the hobby? Besides looking at houses online and dream of a home, you have no possibility of owning a property in sight. The piano keyboard is sitting by the TV everyday. It just never got played. Even leaving the apartment take so much effort, you’ve rather stay and browse pictures of Ester the Wonder Pig.

Where is the passion? You’ve finally started to go listen to start-up founders’ talks again. You are still attending talks at the Yale club. You still cares about women and minorities and determined to spend your career and after-work hours helping them. And you’ve finally have an idea in mind. But wait, there is the visa issue, there is the CFA exam, there is the moving fees, credit and social cost if you get kicked out of the country.

What could you do if this is all there is. Is this what a dull (adult) life is about? You can’t create change, add meanings, or simply have fun.

This is what you could do:

  1. Devote yourself in your mission.
    • Collect researches. Start putting ideas together.
    • Attend events. Absorb new ideas. Expand your reach.
    • Put thoughts into action. Learn technical skills.
  2. Motivate yourself, spend time doing interesting things alone. Get the gym membership back. Play piano twice a week, even for half an hour.
  3. Discipline yourself. Delete cellphone games. Add apps that tie to your final goal and career interest.
  4. Don’t give up, pivot.

We all live in a world of constraints. Without constraints, how could we even play games? In fact, games are about rules. Games are about constraints. So is life.

The key to winning the game is to find ways to break out of the constraints. It is always difficult to do. But throughout the process, you abilities will be strengthened, your determination will be tested. You will discover who are the people who stand beside you, and who sit across the road laughing, secretly hoping that you fail. So you could be mediocre like them.

Don’t live a dull life, live a purposeful one, live a life of dreams and pursuing the dreams, live a life of trying and falling and standing up, just like when you were young. This is the only life worth living.

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